Safeguarding Neurodivergent individuals from spiritual abuse

To mark the publication of our new NdC Original resource: Safeguarding Neurodivergent Individuals from Spiritual Abuse, Kay Louise Aldred shares her experience of spiritual abuse and offers two suggested applications for the resource she has authored.

I doubt I’m alone in the neurodivergent community in being a ‘seeker’ of belonging, connection, meaning and purpose, or as someone who has looked for these things within a variety of community settings, organisations, and places, after not experiencing them in my family of origin or schooling.   

This lifelong compulsion and search to fulfil these (entirely natural, yet unmet) needs positioned me onto a lifelong path of studying, experiencing, and training in theology, spirituality, and wellness modalities. 

On my journey and within these communities, I encountered extremes and very little moderation, ‘middle way’ or balance.  There were either blissful, ecstatic, and sacred teachings, practices and experiences of love, transcendence, and oneness (often dissociative in nature and out of touch with reality and day to day life) or teachings, practices and experiences of the exact opposite, hate, darkness, and division.  In addition, I have personally experienced myself or witnessed others being groomed, exploited, bullied, and abused, including sexually, within these settings; religious, spiritual and wellness forums.  

It was all very binary; either/or, us versus them, right or wrong, which on the one hand appealed to my longing for the ‘right’ way to live but on the other led to fear, mistrust, stress, restriction, masking, and exclusion. 

In my lived personal and professional experience, I believe neurodivergence has increased my own and others vulnerability and risk within these arenas.  Dr Devon Price writes in Unmasking Autism. The Power of Embracing our Hidden Neurodiversity, that although they have found no empirical evidence of the prevalence of this, they also see the correlation.  Price writes, 

‘When you have never been able to move through the world comfortably, you’ll seek relief and meaning where you can find it.  For a subset of Autistic people, that means falling into abusive, cultlike communities.”

— Dr Devon Price, Unmasking Autism.  The Power of Embracing our Hidden Neurodiversity, p 132  

With that said, here at Neurodiverse Connection we have produced a new resource for our Grooming and Coercive Control Summit called Safeguarding Neurodivergent Individuals from Spiritual Abuse. I’d like to offer two suggestions for its wider application below: 

01
Andrew Tate as a promotor of abuse, and his exploitation of the human need for purpose, meaning and belonging. 

While opinions about Andrew Tate can vary widely, there are certain aspects of his public persona and statements which can be red flagged: 

  • Toxic Masculinity: Some of Tate's statements and beliefs have been interpreted as promoting toxic masculinity, which can perpetuate misogyny and abuse of women. 

  • Stigmatisation of Mental Health: Tate has made controversial comments about mental health, suggesting that individuals experiencing mental health distress are weak.  

  • Victim-Blaming: Some of Tate's statements have been perceived as victim-blaming, particularly in the context of mental health struggles and sexual violence. 

  • Aggression and Verbal Abuse: Some people find Tate's communication style to be aggressive and confrontational, which can create a hostile or intimidating environment. 

02
Online Wellness Influencers and their online courses as fraudulent and exploitive. 

Red flags to consider when discerning whether to follow an online influencer or buy their products or resources: 

  • Lack of Credibility: If the course is not accredited, it might not meet educational standards. Plus check the qualifications of the influencer – are they qualified professionally and academically to give advice? 

  • Too Good to Be True: Does the course promises unrealistic outcomes career or life wise or a cure? Education and wellbeing take time and effort. 

  • Ambiguity or Undue Pressure regarding Costs: If you feel pressured to enrol quickly due to ‘limited spots’ or ‘time-sensitive’ discounts, it's a warning sign. In addition, refund policies should be clear too. 

  • Misinformation: Watch out for communities spreading unverified or harmful health advice.  

  • Extreme or Dangerous Practices: Communities advocating extreme, dangerous, or unregulated wellness, spiritual or dietary practices without proper scientific backing or research, can pose serious health risks. 

  • Exclusionary Behaviour: If a community discriminates against certain groups, promotes unhealthy body image standards, or promotes exclusive ideologies, it may not supportive or safe space.

Remember to trust your gut instinct. If you are unsure or encounter any of these or other red flags consult professionals, do additional research or contact national advisory organisations, such as Citizens Advice, or ask trusted friends or family to get alternative perspectives. 


Kay Louise Aldred

Associate (she/her)

Kay is passionate about increasing awareness of the gifts of neurodivergence. She is late diagnosed autistic, has parented neurodivergent children of her own and has taught 11-18 year old neurodiverse students. Kay has worked pastorally and therapeutically with children and adults throughout her whole career within educational, retreat and wellness settings. Currently she offers Disability Student Allowance (DSA) specialist university mentoring for autistic students.

@kaylouisealdred

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